YOO HOO DARLING!
FABULOUS FREELANCE FASHION INVESTIGATOR
FASHIONETTE QUERY 205:
I just picked up my summer photos from Costco. And my GAWD, my play cousin was right, the back of my legs are starting look like the rind of a tangelo. I CAN NOT afford to go to Tysons for lipo until next year and I’ve already booked my trip to Marrakesh for New Year’s. HELP!
First things first, doll. Be sure to reset your body image by watching at least 3 Bond movies featuring Sean Connery. Believe it or not, there was a time when even women with cellulite could be cast as a femme fatale. Next, purchase some WELEDA BIRTH CELLULITE OIL and combine with the cupping system from LURE ESSENTIALS. Finally, rub down your legs with BLISS FAT GIRL SLIM caffeine cream. Read all about Dr. Oz’ review of using caffeine to reduce cellulite. Good Luck and God’s Speed, darling.
Sorting It All Out
A Faction (Fashion+Fiction) Episode Featuring Fashion Attorney Mariessa Terrell
In an effort to reduce the height of the mail tower that accumulates, as if by magic to the left of my front door, I decided to dedicate Friday between 12 and 2 am to sorting, shredding and filing. I’m up anyway pacing and strategizing on ways to infuse social justice into fashion law so it seems somehow fitting. Of course it’s still dark - but the lilluminated oversized “M” hanging proudly above my bed - bright, but not too bright, helps to lend a bit of party to an otherwise somber pre-dawn chore.
I’m dangerous, wielding an actual gold knife, part of an 8 piece Versace cutlery set gifted by my BFF, Simone Butterfly, Christmas 2015.
The knife, too beautiful for eating re-heated sides from DC’s finest carryouts makes the perfect gilded letter opener. The first envelope I slash open bears a return address from Lori. Apparently she will buy Brookland homes for cash. “If had a nickel for every simulated letter- from a phantom homebuyer, I would not need to refinance,” I say a little too cynically to Paris Hilton Marie who is busy preening in front of the mirrored lingerie cabinet.
After about 20 minutes of ploughing through the pile, I begin to feel exasperated. My English breakfast tea was cold and the CLE that I was streaming on trademark licensing in the beauty industry had ended.
I grabbed the last stack of mail intending to toss it into a box labeled “Someday is not a day of the week;" when to my amazement, the pile leaped out of my hand, diving and scattering in a 180 degree radius just beyond the foot of my bed.
It’s 1 am now and the black tea has been replaced with coconut vodka from a black leather flask that I keep on my bureau next to the Armani Prive. That is when I saw it- a jubilant photo postcard of a magical stallion draped in daisies who refused to be bridled. I picked up the note and immediately laugh out loud.
Yoo Hoo Darling!
What ever you are doing right now…. S-T-O-P! I am sending you a plane ticket to Napa. Par Quoi? Because I’m celebrating what is left of summer and you need to sleep. Don't worry I won't mail the tickets. We both know that you will never find it in that tower of mail near your front door.
#YOOHOODARLING 💋#iSPYfashion @entertain_dc FRIDAYs at 9pm on #DCN CH 16 | #Comcast CH 13 | #RCN CH 16 | #Verizon CH 16 @entertain_DC @202creates @acreativeDC #myDCcool
#Spotted in #Brookland USA 🌹 beauty abounds...search for it, darling! #iSpyFashion 🦋
#YooHooDarling For more #fashion adventures in the #DiamondDistrict 🔷 WDC and beyond watch 🖥 #SBF3I #FRIDAY at 9pm on #DCN CH 16 | Comcast CH 13 | RCN CH 16 | Verizon CH 16 💋 #iSPYfashion 🔍
Not quite #Beyonce but feeling a bit #Dangerous 💋 For more #SimoneButterfly 🦋watch 🖥 every Friday at 9pm on #DCN CH 16 | Comcast CH 13 | RCN CH 16 | Verizon CH 16 @entertain_dc @202creates @cfae_dc ❤️ Oh, and Merci 😻 Byron @BReal2288 for capturing my angles 📹
The beauty of cultivating a relationship with God: eventually you will reach a point when you are no longer a supplicant but a daughter who has permission to appropriate. As a family member, you needn't even ask; you simply walk in the kitchen and take and eat. Today I am saying NOW Lord. The wait is over. No more delay.
Wild is the Wind that gently stirs my imagination these days. I am inspired to walk forward toward the water without any cover overhead and without a boat underfoot. Some days I am terrified. .... but I am reminded that Miracles abound even in 2017. I'm now...walking forward knowing the RED SEA will part so that I might continue on dry land!
I agree with Audrey, HAPPY GIRLS ARE THE PRETTIEST GIRLS. But how do you conjure up happiness at will? You can't. But I know someone who can! www.BFLYforJESUS.blogspot.com
Do you #DIYdarling ⁉️ We certainly do and on #Episode1 of Simone Butterfly we learn first hand how to resuscitate a pair of gently worn Juicy Couture waxed denim jeans.
Apparently all they needed was an ARTivist like Zsudayka Nzinga to lovingly hand paint silver roses all over them.
If I can DIY DARLING, you can too! Watch Episode 1 of Simone Butterfly Fashion Investigator for step by step instructions on how to resurrect your own denim.
#IspyFashion PLUS visit ZsudaykaNzinga.com for original figurative #art to illuminate ur home your office! #ShopLocal #SaveTheArts #DCisFashion #202Creates #DCN @theDCarts
Are you looking 👀 for a custom suit that is @KNOTSTANDARD ? Well, darling, you're in luck.
Watch Episode 1: Simone Butterfly Fashion Investigator to learn more about KNOT STANDARD and co-owner Matt Mueller.
"Knot Standard creates a luxury menswear experience like no other; using trusted stylists, fit technology, and classic tailoring. Each custom look is as individual as you are."
#IspyFashion 🔍at 2304 14th St NW / WDC 💋
KnotStandard.com #ShopLocal #DCisFashion #202Creates #DCN
The Wonder Woman theme was barely audible through the haze of the third Jim Bean Honey toddy that I imbibed before I finally drifted off to sleep. "Is anyone going to answer that?," I exclaimed to Paris Hilton Marie, my tawny kitty cat standing at attention, paws gripping the side of my the bed.
I was just beginning to doze off when I heard the theme song again.
“All the world is waiting for you
and the power you possess
In your satin tights
fighting for your rights”
It was indeed my custom Marvel branded doorbell.
The latest flu bug combined with lack of sleep and a ridiculous work schedule has laid me lower than President Trump’s current approval ratings.
Needless to say, by the time I made it to the front door, the delivery man had come and gone and left a bundle of the most delicious pink and lavender peonies on my doorstep. This was the 4th flower delivery in the span of 5 days.
One bundle was from mom (smile). Two were from members of my staff. But…the 4th one …well, the 4th one was unsigned.
“Hmmm…a secret admirer?,” I thought.
Perhaps the bouquet was gifted by the NY venture capitalist I met on the Tube in London; or the concierge at the Miami Kimpton hotel where I work remotely part time; or perhaps my new biz partner sent them- he did promise to keep the current project under budget...
Perplexed, I snuggled deeper into my fleece lined fuschia kimono and slowly climbed the stairs of the DollHouse.
My bedroom, usually flooded by light from 3 floor-to-ceiling windows, was shuttered: a veritable hothouse thanks to an electric heater and a humidifier softly gurgling to no one in particular.
After spritzing Tom Ford Violet Blonde on my PB Teen Emily & Meritt sheets, I slipped back under my dotted duvet, flowers to my left and right, and considered 2017.
It's off to a good start.
Ready. Set. Go!
...as soon as this fever breaks, darling!
SIMONE BUTTERFLY FASHION INVESTIGATOR profiles original songwriter, figurative painter and art instructor James Terrell; perfects the tie and dye technique with fashion designer & HU professor Mikki Taylor; shops REDEEM boutique; suppers with MELVIN HINES, co-owner of WICKED BLOOM; and discusses the pitfalls of using a surname as a trademark.
SIMONE BUTTERFLY FASHION INVESTIGATOR profiles DC cupcake pioneer WARREN BROWN, creator of CAKELOVE IN A JAR; creates table centerpieces for a beach themed wedding with DARLENE HARRINGTON; shops UESA VINTAGE GOODS boutique; samples BROOKLAND'S FINEST American bistro cuisine; and discusses how to avoid the Ian Fleming debacle by learning to collaborate successfully with co-creators.
SIMONE BUTTERFLY FASHION INVESTIGATOR profiles MELISSA MICHELLE who worked with an actual chemist to create her own line of bespoke makeup; learns to make jewelry using semi precious gemstones with ELENA CRUSOE; shops VINTAGE AND CHARMED boutique; samples CHEZ BILLY'S French cuisine; and discusses the types of IP rights an artist obtains once she creates a work of art.
SIMONE BUTTERFLY FASHION INVESTIGATOR profiles JARMAL HARRIS fashion designer and founder of The Jarmal Harris Project; ; learns to repurpose shoes by covering them with cloth with Helen Lolita; shops ROSIES & ROCKER boutique; exhales over afternoon tea at the HENELY PARK HOTEL; and discusses why every creative can benefit from a team of Creative Legal Advocates.
Simone Butterfly has been investigating fashion with a twinkle & a twirl since 2003.