How I Got to Geneva (A Cautionary Tale in Couture)

It started, as many of my stories do, with a closet full of gowns but no gas in the car.

I had just finished a rehearsal for Shiloh Baptist's rendition of the Seven Last Words when Margarita — my  agent and chaos coordinator—called.

"You need to be in Geneva by Wednesday."
"Geneva? As in, Switzerland?"
"Yes. Rolex is doing a thing. You’re on the list."

I stared at the blinking battery light on my iPhone 13 and did a quick mental inventory:

• Passport? ✅ (Stashed in an Audrey Hepburn jigsaw puzzle box)
• Flight? ❌ (Spirit doesn’t go to Switzerland)
• Money? ❌ (Unless you count the $200 in tips from Embassy Row and birthday points at Sephora)
• Faith the size of a Chanel button? ✅✅✅

Turns out, a low-key fashion foundation called Watch & Whisper had seen me perform at the Allegory Bar at the Eaton (thank you, soft lighting and Insta filters). One of their board members—rumored to be a Calvin Klein muse turned crypto queen—made a call.

By morning, I had a roundtrip ticket from JFK to GVA via IcelandAir, a reservation at Hôtel Les Armures, and a velvet envelope labeled PRESS ACCESS: ROLEX.
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The luggage? Missing in action. But the essentials? Packed in a Yvette Crocker carry on. I wore a Valentino trench from Secondi, and carried a hatbox from L Train Vintage. With my spirits high and my wig higher I approached customs.

Of course, I  was pulled aside. Not for contraband, though, but because the officers thought I was someone. When asked, I nodded solemnly.  "Aren't we all?"

The officer laughed. I laughed. But my luggage never arrived.

By the time I hit the Rolex floor in Geneva—face beat, lips lacquered, and swaddled in borrowed Balmain—I looked like real money even if my bank account was giving “pending transaction.”

​The new Rolex? A platinum Land Dweller with an integrated bracelet that had me plotting a DIY version featuring a Moschino belt.

The afterparty?  A private suite reserved for 25 royal guests from Cameroon.  Naturally, I sang a Nina Simone–Roberta Flack medley. These days protest songs hit the same all over the world. 

We are all trying to overcome something or someone,
​S1mOne