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 Shut Down 🙀 & Salon Ready?!Yoo Hoo Darling," Simone cooed as she glided up to me.
"Hey Girl!," I said with a smile. “I haven't seen you since July. Where have you been hiding?" "Not hiding, darling. Just strategizing," Simone said. "About what?!," I asked. "How to navigate a government shut down." Simone quipped. "What do u mean??," I asked. "I’ve been contemplating how far off the grid I can go." Simone said. "Considering your beauty regime, I’m thinking you can’t go far," I said. "Don’t be so sure.” Simone countered. "Covid was good for one thing. I now know how to keep up appearances without a bi-weekly salon visit.” “How is that?,” I asked. "YouTube University," Simone said. "What’s your channel?," I asked. Coming soon, darling. Be the cake🍰, xoxo S1m0ne SimoneButterfly.com Fashion stories to inform & inspire
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 One of Estee Lauder's heirs coined the term "lipstick effect" to refer to the propensity to invest in a smidgeon of glamour come what may. I am a true believer. It's Fashion Week in New York and I have ditched my sack cloth (worn since August 2023 for a Pretty Little Thing gold goddess of a dress by Naomi Campbell. Priced from $16 to $160, even a freelance fashion investigator can afford threads designed by a super. Be the cake,  P.S. Are you enjoying my content? Tell my manager.😉
 So, I’ve been re-reading Amy O’Dell’s book on Anna [Wintour] And I’ve discovered we have a lot in common. Like Anna, my stylist drops by my row house to blow out my hair each morning. Her name is Quanisha and she teaches at Bennet hair school 5 blocks away. So long as the grits are hot and the coffee is iced, Q is happy to hook me up before work. It takes a fashion village, darling! The only life worth living is the one you create. S1m0ne💋  We interrupt your regularly scheduled programming with a NEWS UPDATE. Beloved British Vogue Editor in Chief, Edward Enninful leaves his top position for a newly created one...global creative and cultural advisor.   I decided to start the DollHouse renovation project in my bedroom. Here's how it started.
-- 🛁 🫧 -- 🧼🚿 -- 🛁 🫧 -- 🧼🚿 -- 🛁 🫧 -- 🧼🚿 -- 🛁 🫧 -- 🧼🚿 -- 🛁 🫧 -- 🧼🚿 The fifth contractor agreed with the previous four. It will be damned difficult to install the claw footed high back soaking tub three feet from the canopied bed. Simone, true to form said little. Instead, she tilted her head, blinked her large bright eyes and met his gaze with a faint smile. He countered by gesturing wildly, shaking his head emphatically and repeating his pronouncement with more fervor. "IMPOSSIBLE!" "There are no water pipes on this side of the room," he sputtered. And, "anyway, why would anyone want a bathtub twenty feet from the loo?" Obviously, he has never visited the Mansion on Forsyth Park (Savannah) or seen series one episode four of Miss Phryne Fisher's detective stories. Doesn't he know all DOLLIES require an elixir on occasion?. Take away her 20 minute soak and her hearty Cotes du Rhone red and even our sweet little Simone just might meet them where they are....with a sword at the ready instead of a wand!  I boarded the plane with a renewed sense of purpose. How do I curate a lifestyle similar to Minnie Belle's? From previous conversations, I remembered Minnie had been on her own since she was widowed at 35. Yet, her homes in DC, Cape May, St. Thomas, and Paris spoke of hidden assets. "Organized crime or something else?," I mused. The only thing I knew for certain was that she worked briefly as a model for Halston and then as a political activist in the Black Panther party. I closed my eyes and turned up the volume on the wind chimes playlist emanating from my gold MontBlanc-esque headphones purchased on E-bay. I needed to spend less time focusing on Minnie and more time charting a new course. I signaled the stewardess with the luxe lash extension, "Darling, may I have a tonic water and a lime?" I pulled out my Betsey Johnson flask and splashed a finger's worth of gin into the plastic United Airlines cup. After switching my playlist to Betty Davis, I opened a new OneNote on my phone. Time for a new list. S1m0ne's Spring 2023 Wish List (in no particular order)
S1m0ne's Spring 2023 List of Assets
S1m0ne's Spring 2023 Deal Breakers
What will our little butterfly do next?
 Where in the world is Sim0ne B.? St. Thomas, USA. Minnie Belle spoke the truth. The right apparel can absolutely open doors, windows and hotel vaults. After I finished a few errands, I headed straight to the most exclusive hotel in the county. The Ivy was spectacular, with robin’s egg blue beach chairs and a bar staffed with cocoa brown waiters in sharply creased cargo shorts. Having stored my trunk of garments, shoes, hats, and accessories at the airport, I sat down unencumbered at the outdoor bar. As the tide waltzed in and out, I sipped my sugar rimmed lemon drop, and reflected on a conversation I had earlier that day:
I smiled at the memory and retrieved my song list from my bag. If Omar worked at the Ivy, he might be in a position to hire a lounge singer. Luck favors the prepared, darling. 😉 Fashion stories to entertain & inspire. @Simone.Butterfly
   “Four days before Valentine’s Day and I was no closer to conjuring up a dreamy V-Day celebration. Then, on February 12 at 5 am, I received a phone call from Minnie Belle, my fairy godmother that lives in Cape May. On her recent cruise to see what’s left of the whales in Alaska, she contracted covid, and was air-vac’d to a medical spa in St Thomas. Why St. Thomas? That is where her primary care physician, the very single Dr. Nigel resorts. Minnie wanted me to race to Cape May, pack up her favorite Pucci lounge sets and bring them to her in St. Thomas by Feb. 14. She was planning a takeover of sorts. “Normally, I’d let you stay in my villa,” Minnie said in between sips of what I imagined was an icy rum punch. "But, alas,” she continued, "we are giving her a refresh.” In other words, Dr. Nigel was in residence. “Don’t worry,” I assured her. "My wits, plus a few outfits from your 3rd floor closet is all the currency I need." “Help yourself,” she said with a laugh. The real conundrum: “Could I get myself from NE to Cape May to St. Thomas in a day and a half?” Can Tom Ford sell lace knickers to a man? YES! see Tom’s Spring/Summer 2023 line (pic 14 out of 17) 😉 Happy Valentine’s Day! 💜❤️🖤 #fashion stories to inspire colorful living 🥂   On January 2, 2023, I began mentally preparing for V-Day. And by preparing, I mean I memorized a new mantra to be recited thrice daily, “Forewarned is Forearmed.”
I assure you that this level of cynicism is more nurture than nature and takes at least 3 consecutive valentine day debacles to perfect. It began the year the Vulcan disappeared for the day only to text a photo of himself in a CVS holding my V-card at 10:25pm. It ended the time he invited me to a resort with his sister (who was really his ex). My meltdown, recorded by the hotel CCTV was a daytime Emmy worthy performance. Cupid would not catch me slipping again. 🤷🏾♀️💔👊🏾 #justsaying  I hung up on my accountant, Frasier. During the first five minutes of our conversation, he used the "B" word three times. "BUDGET!" Haven't I given up enough already? I demanded. I already limit my dining companions to Capitol Hill interns, they know where to find the heartiest happy hours, and I replaced my weekly lash extension appointments long ago with strips from Sally Beauty. There simply weren't any more notches on my Moschino belt to cinch. Theatrics aside, Frasier was right. I couldn't sustain my lifestyle without more income. When my agent, Margarita, called with a Christmas engagement at the Greenbrier, I didn't hesitate. "Yes! How much are they paying?" I asked. "They say the package is worth $4,500." "I need money, Rita." "Look on the bright side," she said. "By the end of the week, you'll finally be able to zip up that white Lanvin. That's a bonus, right?" Silence. "There's more," Rita continued. "They've booked you into a pool-facing bungalow and included two spa treatments a day." "What am I supposed to eat?" I asked. "The bungalow has a kitchen." "Do I look like a short-order cook?" Two minutes later, Rita called back. "Greenbrier will provide dinner and drink tickets every day. Breakfast and lunch are on you." "How many sets?" "Two each night. Eight until midnight." "Can I collect tips?" I asked, crossing my fingers. "Absolutely. The tip jar is yours." Now we were talking. I hung up feeling buoyed, but not entirely relieved. Luxurious accommodations for Christmas were lovely, but the Rocket Mortgage calls were becoming increasingly difficult to ignore. I plugged in the canary-yellow Smeg kettle and added a scoop of loose-leaf blueberry tea to my favorite Howard U. mug. What would Minnie Belle do? She had a knack for spinning straw into enough gold to share. By the time the tea had steeped, I had my answer. I texted: “SOS” Jarmal replied almost immediately with “?” “Working for tips this weekend. Need to triple my earnings”. His response arrived before I could put down the phone. “Bob Mackie or Thierry Mugler?” “Mackie.” “On my way.” “Bring 2 bottles of Côtes du Rhône.” “Already in the trunk.” 🗝🔓 Remember, the only life worth living is the one you create! Be intentional this Christmas and let God handle the rest.
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