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V-DAY PREP BEGINS TODAY

1/19/2023

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​On January 2, 2023, I began mentally preparing for V-Day.  And by preparing, I mean I memorized a new mantra to be recited thrice daily, “Forewarned is Forearmed.” 

I assure you that this level of cynicism is more nurture than nature and takes at least 3 consecutive valentine day debacles to perfect.

It began the year the Vulcan disappeared for the day only to text a photo of himself in a CVS holding my V-card at 10:25pm. It ended the time he invited me to a resort with his sister (who was really his ex). My meltdown, recorded by the hotel CCTV was a daytime Emmy worthy performance.

Cupid would not catch me slipping again. 🤷🏾‍♀️💔​👊🏾 #justsaying
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Simone's Ever Green Christmas

12/22/2022

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I hung up on my accountant, Frasier on Thursday. He used the “B” word 3 times during the first 60 seconds of our call. Haven’t I given up enough already? I demanded. I mean, I only eat out with Capitol Hill interns - (they know where the hardiest happy hours are). And, I have long since replaced my weekly lash extension sessions with strips from Sally's. To ask me three times to "BUDGET" beyond that is (in one word)....ridiculous. But Frasier is right about one thing, I cannot sustain my lifestyle without more income.

When, my agent, Margarita called with a Christmas gig at the Greenbrier, I did not hesitate. 

"Yes! How much are they paying?," I asked.  

"They say the package is worth $4500,"  'Rita said.

"I need money, 'Rita." I retorted. 

"The good news: after this week, you will finally be able to get into that white Lanvin sheath. That's a bonus, right?".

[silence]

"Plus," 'Rita continued, "they've booked you into a charming bungalow and comped you two spa treatments per day."

"What am I going to eat?," I demanded. 

"The bungalow has a kitchen," Rita continued. 

"Girl, call them back and ask if they will provide some food vouchers. I am not cooking for two weeks." I pleaded.

Two minutes later, 'Rita called back with better news.

"Greenbrier will provide daily dinner and drink tickets but you are on your own for breakfast and lunch," she said.

"How many songs do I have to sing?", I asked.

"You're booked in the the piano bar from 8pm to midnight. (2 sets)."

"WHAT? Can I at least collect tips?," I asked.

"Yeah, sure," Rita replied. "Your tip jar is all yours."

"Fab!," I enthused.

At least I had somewhere luxe to go for the holidays, I thought. The mortgage could wait two more weeks. Right?!
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🗝🔓  Remember, the only life worth living is the one you create! Be intentional this Christmas and let God handle the rest. 
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NEW JERSEY TURKEY DELIGHT

11/26/2022

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It's the day after Thanksgiving and even though I modified mom's recipe by 1/8, I still have a massive amount of leftovers.  

I may be on my own for the holiday. But, with two Portuguese water dogs and a house sitting gig in Cape May, I am far from lonely. 

Allow me to explain. Since the CFDA awards (Nov 7), I have been sheltering in a renovated Victorian beach house owned by Minnie Belle, a former Halston model who once worked as a Shirley Chisolm's campaign manager. Minnie hired me to watch her house while she scouts humpback whales with her boyfriend in Alaska.

In addition to $500 a week, Minnie granted me unfettered access to her three closets and SAINT, her 1966 Volvo P1800 convertible.

Tonight, like every other night since I arrived, I  light a Juniper candle and try to recreate a look from the 2023 spring/summer collections. Today I channeled Victoria Beckham (VB) and selected a pale pink bias cut ankle length gown from closet #3.  Sadly, Minnie did not have a heavily fringed VB handbag.  So, I simply tucked one of her oversized velvet shawls under my arm...very Victoria Beckham in Paris.

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    Fashion stories to inspire colorful living by Simone, a fashion investigator moonlighting as a hotel bar singer.

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