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Guess who's back from St. Thomas?

4/16/2023

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​I boarded the plane with a renewed sense of purpose. How do I curate a lifestyle similar to Minnie Belle's?   

From previous conversations, I  remembered Minnie had been on her own since she was widowed at 35.  Yet, her homes in DC, Cape May, St. Thomas, and Paris spoke of hidden assets. "Organized crime or something else?," I mused. The only thing I knew for certain was that she worked briefly as a model for Halston and then as a political activist in the Black Panther party. 

I closed my eyes and turned up the volume on the wind chimes playlist emanating from my gold MontBlanc-esque headphones purchased on E-bay.  I needed to spend less time focusing on Minnie and more time charting a new course.  I signaled the stewardess with the luxe lash extension, "Darling, may I have a tonic water and a lime?"

I pulled out my Betsey Johnson flask and splashed a finger's worth of gin into the plastic United Airlines cup. After switching my playlist to Betty Davis, I opened a new OneNote on my phone.  

Time for a new list.

S1m0ne's Spring 2023 Wish List (in no particular order)
  1. Personal chef
  2. Personal driver
  3. Personal gardener (Are you sensing a theme?)
  4. Hair/Makeup team
  5. A cleaning service
  6. A Macgyver of a boyfriend

S1m0ne's Spring 2023 List of Assets
  1. DC row house (located between an open air drug market & a $900,000 townhouse)
  2. Six-speed Dodge Challenger in cobalt blue
  3. Five racks of clothes painstakingly collected since high school
  4. A more than passable alto singing voice
  5. Journalistic tendencies in the field of fashion
  6. Direct access to the Holy Spirit

S1m0ne's Spring 2023 Deal Breakers
  1. Thou shalt not neglect thy pre-dawn spiritual practices.
  2. Thou shalt not be distracted by men with no legitimate streams of income.
  3. Thou shalt not pay retail....ever.
  4. Thou shalt only drink top shelf when at home. 
  5. Thou shalt adopt a fitness regimen without paying a monthly membership.
  6. Thou shalt not compare thyself to self-made social media mavens.

What will our little butterfly do next?
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